Some impressive journalism from The Svenhunter:
For years the song ‘Holla Back Girl’ by Gwen Stephanie (who suffers from the same multiple-first name disorder as John Terry) has baffled and infuriated critics with its apparently meaningless lyrics and inane catchiness.
The former issue I can now Decode, for I have solved it:
When Gwen Stephanie sings “A few times I’ve been around that track / So it’s not just gonna happen like that” she is letting us into the secret of her age: that she is much, much older than she looks and indeed claims to be. Probably over 100.
This means she must be either a witch (unlikely – witches rarely pursue careers in pop music) or a faerie creature (for time moves differently for these people).
When she says “I’m ready to attack, gonna lead the pack” she clearly warns the listener that her breed of elf hunts together, which narrows it down somewhat.
Her repeated claims that “This shit is bananas” refers to the fairy folk’s capability to deceive us humans by disguising base objects as treasure. Indeed, goblins pass off all sorts of horrible things as “fruit”, and Goblin fruit, like faeces, can be addictive once you get used to consuming it.
Finally, though – in the title of the song she insists, repeatedly: “I ain’t no hollaback girl / I ain’t no hollaback girl“.
Research has led me to the conclusion that this is American slang for “I am not one of those hollow-backed girls,” referring, of course, to the curious deformation found in the huldra or huldrefolk women of Norway and other north countries. The huldra are also known for being easy lays so with Gwen and her “pack” it’s not “just gonna happen like that.”
This leads me to conclude that she belongs to the enemy clan of the huldrefolk: the trolls.
Gwen Stephanie is a pop troll. Case closed.