Tuesday, June 8th, 2010

So I totally joined the Hackney Council Community Gym! I’ve cycled there and back two days in a row – twice yesterday cos I had to register then come back to fill in my personal details three times over, twice on paper and once on a compute – bloody wasteful council bullcrap – and get my induction.

The lady who inducted me was hilarious. First she got ridonculously excited about my Polish surname, as she was, herself, “100% real Polish”. Then she got even more excited after I’d done some stupid test on a computer. “You want to be POWER MAN!” she exclaimed, joyfully, shouting over my protestations that I “merely wish to be normal and fit and healthy like Bruce Lee” with cries of, “Yes! POWER MAN! All Polish men want to be power man! This is very good!”

She then showed me around, helpfully pointing out that the instructions on the various machines showed you how to use them. “The running machine is very boring,” she told me, behind her hand, like people do in old films. “Who wants to run on plastic sheet all day? I want to be power man too!”

I have been going to the gym with my old pal Jeres, former guitarist in The Women, current guitarist in White Witches, and on and off  experience addict. He is a demon on the running machines. He did 5k today in 25 minutes. I couldn’t be arsed to do more than 10. I was cycling an hour there and back anyway. I had plenty of bloody cardio, thank you all the same.

What else happened today?

Well, I posted MC Larsnew video in the Blob Blog earlier, a visual for a deeply touching song called Twenty-Three, about a friend of his who commited suicide. Amazingly enough, it turns out it was inspired by my song, Patrick, which I recently listened to for the first time in two years with Littles, who was, rightly, amazed by it. I am amazed by it. It is a flipping hardcore song. Anyway, big up Lars. I think its time for us to do that collaboration we’ve been talking about since ’05.

Elsewhere, I unfollowed all those Boondocks avatars on Twitter. They had become annoying, unrepresentative of their characters, and deeply whorish. Grandpa bid me adieu with the following:

See? Totally out of charcter. I wonder who does them? How much do they get paid? Does Aaron McGruder approve?

Never mind that though. We have important things to work out. See, we got representation issues.

If you look for me on on Spotify, or iTunes, or whatever, all you’ll find is my really early EPs and this bastardised version of my first album with a load of shit tacked on to the end that my old label put out last month without telling me (I had to find out via flipping Google Alert) after I’d told them specifically not to. Reissue reissue repackage, and I’m not even dead yet! Ruining my album. You know how long I spent getting that album into the shape I got it into? You know what a labour of love that was? My first album! A lifetime’s dream! And you stick a load of home recordings onto the end of it and call it “special edition” or some shit to try and con people into buying it or whatever? How dare you! I was outraged. Truly I was. And I still am. Seethe! Rage!

Anyway. The point is that, to those that don’t frequent this wonderful, groundbreaking, epoch defining website, I might as well have died in 2006. So we need to edumacate their asses, before we hit them upside the head with The Life Equation, and change the course of history for ever and ever. What I want to do is this – to put together an EP (extended play) of my finest works, following the release of When We Were Young up until now, the eve of The Life Equation. I will take these recordings, polish them up, treat them with respect and love, give them the mastering I was never able to before, and release them into the world, where anybody can find them. Hopefully in about 6 weeks. On the day of that release I will announce the release date of The Life Equation, and we will set about our Great Work.

It’s gonna be tricky. I have made a hell of a lot of music in the past 3 and a half years. So I am asking all my friends for their opinions on the matter, and that includes YOU, dear reader. Please help me out in this endeavour by listing you favourite post WWWY, pre TLE songs in the comments below. Write as many as you like. If someone else has already posted one you like, post it too! That way I will get a better idea of what everybody’s favourites are. Remember, if you’re stuck, there’s a great big discography here for you to look around in and refresh your memory, or even create some new ones.

Naturally, I will be thanking you all for your invaluable efforts in the credits. So leave whatever name best suits, or, if you’re shy, email it to me.

Let’s go!

PS – News of ATD24 on tomorrow’s Doncast. 5pm UK time. Be there.

— Tuesday, June 8th, 2010

Saturday, April 18th, 2009

Littles Mug Shot > Yours

“If You Didn’t Have A Gun Then I Wouldn’t Need A Gun…”

My dear friend Martin Carr wrote that. I don’t know what song it’s from [Edit – it was Free Huey, see above, thanks to Dubzi in the comments], it showed up in the random lyrics generator on his new Zef-built website. But it’s a very beautifuly put truth.

What was it Bukowsi said about art?

“Genius could be the ability to say a profound thing in a simple way”

I think that was it.

I just got off the phone with Littles’ girl, the subject of his sweetest love songs, the “Greek chick that’ll wet you up for talking shit” from Out On Bail, and the mother of his just-born baby boy. Dude’s doing OK in Pentonville, where’s he’s kicking off a five year sentence on 23 hour lock up, and got himself the majority of a page in The Enfield Advertiser last week, in one of those glorious copy paste straight from the Swine’s mouth stories, illustrated by the un-typically flattering mugshot above. No, they didn’t bother getting in touch with any of Littles’ peoples, and any hope of keeping this on the DL until dude gets to appeal is gone.  Hell – it’s the most read story on the paper’s website. I copy paste now, corrections in bold:

A MAN has been jailed for five years after detectives discovered a powerful [antique] handgun hidden in a sock in his bedroom.

Dean Crawford, 26, of Enstone Road, Brimsdown, pleaded guilty to possessing the revolver and was jailed at Wood Green Crown Court for five years last Thursday.

The court heard Crawford was arrested after police, acting on a tip-off [snitch], raided his home on August 9 last year. Once inside, officers scoured the house and discovered the six-shot [antique] Smith and Wesson revolver concealed in the white sock in a box on top of a wardrobe.

When interviewed by officers, Crawford initially told police the weapon was not his and that he had found it in a nearby park [but was forced to change his plea to “guilty”, as “innocent” would have gotten him 7 years.]

Following last week’s sentence, PC Kevin Foley said: “The lengthy term that Crawford has received shows we will not tolerate gun crime and that we will do everything within our power to remove guns from the community.”

Meanwhile, video evidence of Our Dear Police’s abuses at the G20 protests the other week continues to stack up. And Ian Tomlinson’s second post-mortem points to ‘abdominal haemorrhage’, not heart attack, as cause of death. From The Telegraph:

The findings of the latest post mortem was that Ian Tomlinson died from an abdominal hemorrhage.

According to medical experts, the most common cause would be trauma caused by a car accident, stabbing, gunshot or blow with a boot or blunt instrument.

Oh really. How many years for these swine that actually hurt killed someone? How do we go about demonstrating that we will not tolerate the biggest gang in the UK indiscriminately attacking us, and that we will do everything within our power to remove said swine from the community?

Anyway. I’m gonna be talking to Littles tomorrow,  and I’ll get an address you can write to him at. I’m gonna get him to write a weekly blog or something as well, and I’m gonna put together a mixtape of the best stuff we’ve recorded here at Don Studios over the past few years, released and unreleased, to remind the world how fucking great he is, and raise some dough for his kid. If anyone wants to do some remixes/production for that, or has any ideas of what songs should be included, let me know.

— Saturday, April 18th, 2009

Saturday, April 12th, 2008

— Saturday, April 12th, 2008